'None of This Heals the Harm That's Been Done'

A child’s trauma was weaponised on Monday night. The rioting in Ballymena was never about protecting women. It was about power.

A young girl - a child - has had something utterly reprehensible done to her. My heart goes out to her, her family, and with everyone standing with them in support. No child should ever suffer what she’s been through. She deserves justice, and she deserves a community that protects her.

4090 sexual offences were recorded in NI last year. If violence was how we responded to sexual violence, the streets would be burning every day. But they’re not. And they won’t be. Since 2020, 25 women have been killed violently in NI. No riots. Most of those responsible were men from here. Pretending this threat solely comes from outsiders while ignoring what’s happening in our homes is cowardice.

The truth's harder to face. The real threat to women here doesn’t come from people arriving from other places. It comes from men.  And as in this case, sometimes boys. From a culture that refuses to take responsibility for its own violence. NI remains one of the most dangerous places in Europe to be a woman. The numbers are there. The stories are there. The grief is there for anyone who cares to see it.

Rage is understandable. But if your outrage leads to racial scapegoating instead of demanding justice, you’ve made your choice clear; it was never about her.

There’s a choice to be made. People can keep swallowing the stories they’re handed, letting their anger be shaped for them, treating strangers like enemies 'cause someone told them to. Or they can start asking who benefits when communities tear themselves apart. If you’re angry, good. Be angry at the systems that fail victims, at the poverty that breeds violence, at the men who get away with it again and again.

And if you've suddenly found yourself with an urge to do more to protect women, great. Support Women’s Aid. Fund services for survivors. Push for proper consent education. Stand with (and listen to!) the people who've been doing this work for decades. Hold the perpetrators accountable. Hold the politicians stoking hate accountable. Hold the people exploiting this violence accountable. But don’t pretend you’re helping victims by attacking strangers.

What’s happening isn’t new. It’s what always happens when fear's louder than solidarity. When people are told that scarcity is someone else’s fault instead of asking who built the system that left them with nothing. There’s always someone ready to point the finger; always someone ready to hand you an enemy.But none of it fixes anything. None of it makes women safer. None of it heals the harm that’s been done. And none of it will stop until people decide to stop letting fear choose their enemies for them.

Aaron Kelly